Arteries and capillaries, carrying lifeblood like so many
Paths of least resistance, pumped by adrenaline and the
Desire, the need for escape, for discovery, for cleansing
Ferrying seekers to the beginning of journeys or perhaps
Their logical conclusion, epiphany as destination
That the trails exist at all is a happy accident, humans
Trodding the same paths as the indigenous fauna and
Figuring that these routes should be formalized, catalogued
As only people are wont to do, a taxonomy of nature
That means nothing to the dirt, but everything to the folks above
As with fiscal inheritances, there are those that shepherd these
Bequests with the care necessary and intended, who heartily
Welcome all wanderers, who sweetly smile at all visitors,
Who know that it is a privilege to be upon this earth at all
And which recognition is directly apparent on their countenance
As with financial legacies, there are those that squander these
Benefactions with an apparently purposeful inattention, an
Alarming dereliction of bounty and opportunity and instead
Myopically treat every passerby, every pilgrim as an obstacle,
Scowling with a demonic vehemence, missing the point entirely
To what end does one aspire by bringing bad juju to a place of joy,
What colossal misfortune must one suffer to bark at an errant dog,
Under which weight has one labored to squeal at a meandering child,
How gargantuan of a trauma must one have endured to ruin the vibe,
Why in the name of all that is holy is it necessary to suck so greatly?
Juxtaposed against the benevolence, joy, and grace of the trail fairies,
The trail grump seems particularly misguided, triggering a mix of concern
And consternation in equal measures, it being hard to decide whether to
Censure with mighty reproach or hug with the strength of a small army,
Or at least to sit by a nearby campfire and seek to understand why
Those that steward the trails with their physical labors or their emotional
Bolsters are the exemplars of the selflessness, the subtle care, the
Pure energy that it takes to operate as a person and therefore in service of
Humanity, knowing innately that this world is for the sharing, but which
Such social dynamics require outsized inputs from those who are willing and able
The trail grouch did not play well in the sandbox, had an adult sensibility then
And a childish one now, petulant and cranky and sorely in need of a spanking
Of the non-consensual, non-sexy variety even though corporal punishment is
Distasteful and we prefer to take the high road or path as the case may be
Because we will not compromise our values even to attempt to impose them
Shovel in hand, McLeod slung over the shoulder, the trail fairy sets off for work
Not paid for the labor but compensated nonetheless by the knowledge that all
Sweat is for the enjoyment of the multitudes, that a child will skip merrily along
With nary a thought of what it takes to maintain the path which is as it should be
Since children’s purview is to internalize the beauty of nature and figure out the rest later
If all were grumps, there would be no paths to traverse, no desolate spaces in which
To amble, just complaints and even more pent-up aggression and we already have
Enough of that in our halls of power and commerce so we need an antipode, a
Counterpoint to the corruptions and consternations of the artificial world so that we do
Not go completely insane, just the kind of crazy that lets you set off into the woods untethered
A casual greeting, a nod of acknowledgement, a brief grin, these are not hard
Outcomes to achieve, are readily and happily given by those fairies and even casual
Tourists, even if they are deep in the throes of cardiovascular exertion or having a terrible
Day or don’t like you, it’s called common courtesy and that seems a bit of a misnomer since
Commonality is a trait that we are societally lacking in practice but not in theory
Uphill bikers have the right of way, hikers have priority, horseback riders even further
Grace, which are not inconveniences or abominations, but practical and logistical
Compromises that must be heeded not just because they are the code of conduct, but for
Safety reasons and grumbling or grunting or outright losing one’s marbles is not going to do
Anything but give an aneurysm and at least make the recipient feel terrible for no reason
The fairy’s compensation may be intangible, but the opportunity for the grump to gain absolution
For trail-related transgressions is firmly rooted in the ground on which the violations occurred,
Penance being just a pickaxe away, a solid bit of digging and shaping and creating berms and
Drainage for the deluges will wash away the accumulated sins of vibing innocent folks and
Disrespecting the gracious gift of a trail network that needs infinite champions
VVMTA, Hardscrabble, your neighbor, call them up and make good for all those times that
You did not fully appreciate the treasure that exists outside the back door, they will be happy to Take your action or funds or both to continue their missions critical, not quite as dire as
Ending hunger or curing cancer, but in the grand scheme also infinitely more important than
Stock prices or Instagram likes or the other things with which we daily distract ourselves
The army of trail fairies marches on, hopefully blasting so much love throughout the system that
Pressure builds to the point of a cataclysmic explosion of true understanding and change
We can only hope and pray for such a transcendent transmogrification, infinitely better than the
Hollow hopes and prayers offered to those gunned down by our alleged leaders who are
Nothing more than an oligarchy of trail grumps of the most ghoulish variety